So, you met a girl that you’re head over heels for and you want her to feel as strongly as you do. What do you do? First and foremost, you must understand that it is not possible to force anyone to fall in love with you, and it’s not something you can rush. Some people fall in love quickly, and some take time. Pressuring someone may result in them pulling away from you, so be patient and enjoy the magic of watching love grow. That said, there are certain things you can do that will help establish trust, build romance, and encourage love to blossom. So if you’re already dating and you’d like to go level-up, or you have your eye on someone you’d like to date, consider the tips below as steps in the right direction:
Respect her
Her space, her time, her boundaries—all of it. Showing the girl you care about that you respect her is a sure fire way to move closer to her heart. It can be easy to get wrapped up in your emotions and want to spend all your time with her, but she may be a person who needs personal space. Respecting that need will show her that you care and that you are willing to make sacrifices for the sake of her happiness. If she has plans with friends, let her have her girl time without making a fuss. She’ll reward you in the future by respecting your time when you want a boys’ night out. When it comes to physical boundaries, be conscientious. Some women may want to take things slowly in the beginning, and it’s important to both understand and respect that. Bedroom aside, there may be days where she’s feeling less affectionate. Try not to take it personally, and talk to her about it. Chances are she’s just had a bad day and needs a little room, and she’ll appreciate your bowing to her boundaries.
Be a good communicator
That stereotyped concept that women are complicated is silly. Some are, some aren’t—just like men! Women are not puzzles that need to be solved, they’re individuals with their own minds, needs, and desires. In order to learn what the girl of your dreams needs to be happy, there’s got to be fibre-class communication. Listen to her. Be a sounding board for her when she’s having a bad day, and be honest when something is bothering you. Doing this will automatically bring you closer and create a stronger bond between you. Be open with her as much as you can, and don’t be afraid to let yourself be vulnerable—after all, love is a risk worth taking.
Build trust through honesty
This goes hand-in-hand with being a good communicator, but it does bear mentioning. Falling in love can be scary, and sometimes people hold back for fear of getting their hearts broken. To quell that fear, focus on being honest and open with her so she knows that you aren’t going to hurt her down the line. This doesn’t mean you have to say every little thing that pops into your head, but if you find yourself holding certain things back, you may want to ask yourself why. To love someone is to be able to let them see you as everything you are, and at times that means sharing things you may not be comfortable sharing. She’ll appreciate you opening up despite your own discomfort, and it will create a bond of trust between the two of you. This foundation of honesty is a vital keystone for allowing love to grow.
Don’t play games
Silly dating rules like taking time to respond to texts and pretending to be less interested than you are must go out the window if you want to fall in love with one another. Often these little children’s games we play—men and women alike—are a way to hide our own vulnerability. When you wait to text back, it may make you feel like you have power over the conversation; by not wearing your heart on your sleeve and showing you care can protect you from potential rejection. Get over yourself. Quickly. Things like these create a wall between you, and when you play games, it’s more likely she’ll play the same games. If you wait several hours to text, so will she. Try responding as soon as you become aware of her message and you’ll notice her replies come back faster. Likely, she doesn’t want to seem too eager to talk to you for fear of scaring you off. So if you care for her, help her let go of that fear by showing you have no interest in playing games. Can a loving relationship grow out of the little games we play when dating? Sure! But when you build a foundation of just being straightforward with each other, your bond as a couple is more likely be stronger in the long run.
When you wait to text back, it may make you feel like you have power over the conversation; by not wearing your heart on your sleeve and showing you care can protect you from potential rejection. Get over yourself. Quickly. Things like these create a wall between you, and when you play games, it’s more likely she’ll play the same games. If you wait several hours to text, so will she. Try responding as soon as you become aware of her message and you’ll notice her replies come back faster. Likely, she doesn’t want to seem too eager to talk to you for fear of scaring you off. So if you care for her, help her let go of that fear by showing you have no interest in playing games. Can a loving relationship grow out of the little games we play when dating? Sure! But when you build a foundation on being straightforward with each other, your bond as a couple is more likely to be a strong one.
Be romantic
Chivalry doesn’t have to be dead, soldier! Small gestures can mean the world to the girl you’d like to have fall in love with you, and with some very simple planning, you can really impress her. A lot of men tend to get overwhelmed by the idea of being romantic, thinking they have to ride up on a white horse, dozen roses in hand, and a string quartet playing in the background. Most women don’t need something that grand.
What a girl considers romantic varies from woman to woman, so use your communication skills to learn what she likes. Some women love flowers, some find them wasteful. Some women would flutter at the thought of a romantic dinner at a fancy restaurant, while others prefer to stay in, watch Netflix, and cuddle.
Here are a few examples of easy romantic gestures:
- Surprise her with a candlelit dinner. If you’re a good cook feel free to go all out and whip up a gourmet feast, but it really isn’t necessary. Ordering in her favorite take out and lighting candles is as silly and fun as it is romantic, and it’s sure to make her day.
- Plan a picnic. Once again, this can be as elaborate or as simple as you want—it’s the thought that will really make her feel special. You can pack some homemade food, or gather an assortment of bread, cheese, and meat for some do-it-yourself charcuterie. Grab a bottle of wine and a blanket to sit on and find a cozy spot to sit. Parks are great, but your backyard works too! Get her flowers just because. That is of course if she likes flowers. She may not! Pay attention to what she enjoys and occasionally surprise her with it.
- Picking up her favorite candy while you’re running errands, getting her a small knick knack that reminds you of her, etc. will show her you were thinking about her.
- Plan a date night. Don’t wait for her to bring it up—take the initiative and plan something! It doesn’t have to be fancy, even just a simple dinner and a movie will show her you care. The key is just taking the time to show your love through action.
Use the tips mentioned above on building a relationship with the girl of your dreams, and you’ll be well on your way to stealing her heart. Just remember: love grows at its own pace in its own time. Go easy, and your patience will be rewarded.
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